We arrived in Dubuque without a whole lot of free time before the show, which would be at 7:00 PM, which meant a 6:00 PM call time. We gave ourselves a few minutes in the hotel before hitting the road. I came across a TV station called The Tube which was showing a concert video of UB40 performing Sonny & Cher’s “I Got You Babe” with Chrissie Hynde.

Having read about it on Wikipedia and seen the other cast experience it on their video from last year, I wanted to ride on the Fourth Street Elevator, touted as the steepest, shortest scenic railway in the world. It was basically conceived in the 1800s by a mayor who wanted to shorten his commute, so he had a railcar put up the side of a hill.

After much hurrying and grumpiness, we made it out there, and it was neato. The elevator itself is just a short ride in a rickety wooden car, but the top of the hill offers a wonderful view of Dubuque from above. Supposedly, you can see three states from that point, but I couldn’t tell you where Iowa ends and another state begins.

At the bottom of the elevator, there’s a smattering of shops and cafés. We stopped at a place called Mississippi Mug for coffee (I also had a small pizza). They had a “Make Levees, Not War” sticker up behind the counter, on which I commented favorably, and they had gluten-free cookies, which were a Godsend for the gluten-averse Bethany. The guy behind the counter asked us about ourselves, and upon learning that we were actors, talked about his sister, who just left for NYU to study acting. Walking back to the elevator, we passed a store which sold home brewing accessories and wished Michael could be there.

We got to the University of Dubuque just in time for our 7:00 PM show. All of our hurrying and worrying about time had been for naught, however, because we found out around 7:00 PM that the show was actually going to be at 8:00 PM. Crap.

The show went okay. Afterwards, we stopped at a convenience store (next to Butt’s Florist, which made us giggle), so the others could get something to eat. It occurred to Sam and me to get a beer. I joked about getting a 40 of Olde English, to which Sam replied that he was actually thinking about getting a 24oz can of Miller High Life. He didn’t, but I did (because I thought it was hilarious) .

I got my own room again for this, our last night on the road. I sat on the king sized bed, sipped ”the champagne of beers” from a plastic hotel cup, and turned on The Tube todiscover that they were playing ”You Shook Me All Night Long.” If Boudreaux’s Louisiana Seafood gave me a taste of New Orleans cuisine and LSU sports, then the Dubuque Best Western was giving me a taste of Chalmette. I wished I had cut-off jean shorts and a trucker cap to complete the picture. Even though I was by myself, I made sure to throw devil horns to the TV and say, “Fuckin’ right, bra.”

I went to the bathroom and emerged to find that The Tube has an unhealthy fixation on UB40, because now they were playing much more recent concert footage of UB40. At this point, I had seen three videos over the span of four hours, and two of the videos were different UB40 concerts.

I dozed off while watching back-to-back episodes of Mythbusters, hoping I wouldn’t feel too cruddy about having to hit the road at 6:00 AM the next morning.